11/9 And hello Past Brian...this is FUTURE BRIAN, reporting in a month after the beginning of this post. So much has changed! Hurricane Sandy! The election! Banthapug!
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| No, seriously, Banthapug. |
The theme tonight is either 'DELICIOUS' or 'FANCY PANTS', depending on who you ask. Alex feels he's gotten complacent, and wants to do some more challenging menus. Tonight we tackle cheddar biscuits with applesauce, fried green beans with fried mint and fried basil on a bed of tomato compote, quinoa risotto, and pumpkin cake pops!
Me again...don't get too psyched about those cake pops. I'm just saying. Trust me. I'm from THE FUTURE.
Pumpkin cake pop recipe: http://www.foodnetwork.com/recipes/melissa-darabian/pumpkin-cake-pops-recipe/index.html
Fried green beans with tomato compote: www.bravotv.com/foodies/recipiessomethingsomething
cheddar biscuits: bravotv.com/foodies/recipes/print/mini-cheddar-biscuits
First up, the cake for pumpkin cake pops! Well, no, that's a lie, first up we nibble on plantain chips Jim picked up because a) they're crunchy-tasty and b) they're from Costa Rica, where good things come from.
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| Just ask Kristen Bell. |
We also debate who has and does not have dishwashing skills (with only a tiny bit of shaming involved), and huddle around the Roku looking for a music channel to listen to. Soma FM has "Secret Agent: the soundtrack for your stylish, mysterious, dangerous life". Boo to the yeah, cowpokes.
T-shirt tally: I'm in my Random Celtic Knot shirt, Jim's in a polo shirt, Deb's in her pro-Obama shirt (Foreshadowing!!), and Alex wins with a "Jesus is ATOMIC" shirt that was once owned by someone in a Vacation Bible School. Which maybe had a mad scientist theme? We think? Oh, so many questions...
We have fresh apples (love Fall so much) and set to work making applesauce after a quick pause to change the radio station to 'Lush: Sensuous and Mellow Vocals, Mostly Female, With an Electronic Influence'. The first song is by "Merkin Dream", which, for people who know what merkins are, is a VERY puzzling name. Two minutes of that and we're on to 'Indie Pop Rocks!', which might as well be called "WERS-FM, the Roku version". (That line goes out to our local readers--go Camberville!)
Jim is setting to work on the cake while Deb and Alex pare apples for the 'sauce. I'm pondering why, even after seeing the movie, I still can't hear the word "Looper" without thinking of Mr. Hooper from Sesame Street. When a character sticks in my memory, he really really sticks. (Also, the thought of Mr. Hooper as a time traveling criminal is very entertaining).
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| And look at those shelves...there was no way that was a profitable business |
Indie Pop Rocks lasts for 1/2 of one song before giving way to the "Motion Sickness" channel on Mog.
Butter and spices are heating in a pan for the applesauce as Jim is creating a Pumpkin Pie Spice from scratch, with the help of myself and the internet! The biscuits have to wait for the cake to be baked, which seems backwards unless you're versed in Kitchen Science (or just, like, have read both recipes and know how to prioritize).
Gordon Love-Hewitt...far more attractive with his own nose, or with Bruce Willis's? I didn't recognize him as the actor from 'Dark Knight' until this moment, folks, so I got no horse in this race.
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| I'll just put up this picture of him and let you judge. |
Apples set, Deb moves on to the green beans. We go off the recipe early and often. "It calls for two cups....but hey, they're green beans!"
I sniff Jim's milk. Helping! (It's good, btw.) (Not anymore.)
To Deb's shock, Alex confesses he has not yet tasted the butter & spice mixture. And a compliment about a previous recipe--Jim is using the maneuver I tried last week. He's chilling the butter to make it better in the batter! (I'm so in love with that sentence...)
At 5:55 it's Alex--applesauce, Jim--cake batter and Deb--beginning to chop the tomatoes for the tomato compote.
We now have a tiny bit of a sodium-showdown, or showdium, as Deb tries to discourage Alex putting salt in the applesauce. They discuss the difference between saltED and saltY, and seem satisfied with the conclusion.
Cake's in the oven, Jim moves on to the biscuits after a little mise en place clean-up!
With Alex as the surfing member of our cooking team, we quiz him about the surfing training sequence in the Chasing Mavericks trailer we just watched today. He can hold his breath for about a minute and a half, roughly, he thinks, which is only 4 1/2 minutes less than the film's main character--unlike the movie, he has not had a coach with a timer yelling at him about his lung capacity. We're getting him one for Christmas. Oops, spoiler!
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| The movie's dramatic breath-holding scene. (No, SERIOUSLY.) |
There's a break as I take Rommy for a walk and we explore the smellier parts of South Boston. (e.g., all of it.) When I get back, Our Intrepid Team has the cake out, is in the process of popping the biscuits into little muffin tins, and has the tomato and risotto on the stove. We consult the cake pop recipe and realize we might have trouble--we don't have cream cheese for the frosting! Or heavy cream to make a chocolate ganache. We discuss options--Alex proposes orange-chocolate, which sorta fits thematically because the pumpkin cake IS orange, so orange + orange....anyhow. Another thought is toasting some coconut and mixing it with the melted chocolate, then dunking each ball that way. "Why don't we make a ganache out of the 1/2 and 1/2, the unsweetened chocolate and the confectioners sugar and some Fluff, then mix in some toasted coconut...maybe even fry the coconut! Hah? Hah?" Outwardly I'm the face of confidence, dear readers, but between you and me I'm scared. (Almost as if I knew what was going to happen...)
Deb shows off what she's "learned under my tutelage" by heating chocolate in the microwave, pouring in cold 1/2 and 1/2....and suddenly there's a mini-disaster as the chocolate solidifies around her spoon like frat boys swarming a tray of free jello shots. She reheats the chocolate, stirs like a madwoman, adds Fluff (!), and continues stirring while Jim obtains the coconut.
A new invention, "shiitake bacon", comes out of the oven--it's going to go on top of the risotto. It's mushroomy? Yay? Deb is working with the tomato coulis and pondering how chunky it should be while we ooo and aahhh at the sight of the biscuits out of the oven. With the lack of cream cheese we've given up on the "pop" part of the cake pops, so Jim is spreading the chocolate glaze as a frosting.
Please note, we are cutting the unsweetened chocolate with Fluff on the day of Somerville's big Fluff Festival! Hometown pride, yo! We are in touch with our inner fluffers...oh, that didn't sound right.
On Mog, a band called 'Hot Chip' is singing a song that I swear has someone singing "Homina homina HOMINA homina" over and over again. And people wonder about the value of a music degree...(on the other hand, they're still better than Karmin. BOOM! Take that, alums of the school I work at!)
We've reached the beginning of the plating! Deb celebrates by tossing tonight's basil in the frying oil, with explosive results! Well...splattery, anyhow, thanks to the high water content of the leaves. It's all okay after a few seconds.
OR SO I THINK. We point no fingers, but, um, FIRE!!!!!!!
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| The INFERNO |
The coconut was overlooked and went from toasted to flaming in a surprisingly short amount of time, and from flaming to fire-wrangled by Jim to the bottom of the sink with water poured across it remarkably quickly after that. Some cooks might be discouraged by the YARD HIGH FLAMES, but are we? (Yes.) Ha, it is to laugh! (A nervous laugh. With a lot of twitching.) More coconut goes in the oven, and this time Jim hovers an inch from it watching it like a cat watching a mousehole during an Obese, Slow and Proud Rodent Convention....except when he's picking out the Very Prettiest Biscuits to be our food models. All work and no play, you know...
[Jim] I just have to point out that while the flames are flaring high into the sky and I'm calmly, coolly asking Alex for a hot pad, what does he do??? He goes for his camera. See how much he values you, dear readers? He'd rather let my kitchen burn down than deprive you of a great pic illuminating our night. [/Jim]
Have I mentioned that that's Jim's homemade goat cheese grated on the green beans? Jim made the cheese, that is; Jim (to my knowledge) has never created a goat.
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| NOT made by Jim |
After supper and an episode of True Blood with a lot of nekkie fun and a sad lack of Gramma's ghost returning to demand that all these skanky reprobates get the heck off her lawn, it's rating time!
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| Our Meal! |
BISCUITS
Alex: A! Cheesy and wonderful
Jim: A+! Alex is crazy, they deserve an A+
Deb: A-, they needed more cheese but they were damn good
Me: A. Cheesy biscuits make me happy. (The love you're going to have for Gangnam Style is the sign of someone who likes flaky, cheesy things, Past Self).
APPLESAUCE
JIM: A--a little more seasoned than I would normally make it, but I thought it was delicious.
ALEX: I haven't really had homemade applesauce before. It's pretty damn good. I'll give it an A-...I mean, it's still applesauce.
DEB: That was delicious! I'd make that again, so I guess that would be an A. And so easy to make...why would we ever buy that crap?
Me: It still seems like a silly thing to do to perfectly good apples, but as sauce goes, this was one of the best of them. B+
GREEN BEANS
ALEX: A. I thought the sauce had a really, really nice flavor; I thought the beans had a great texture; the fried basil was amazing, the shallots also great, and the grated goat cheese! As it mixed with the tomato sauce it reconstituted into creamy cheesiness. I really liked it.
DEB: If I grade on the basis of taste I'd definitely give them an A. It was a perfect meal......except for the health factor, where deepfrying anything is definitely a bad idea.
JIM: A+! The combination of everything was just awesome. It was the perfect vehicle for my cheese!
Me: B+ This was great...but...I have reservations about tomato sauce and green beans. Replace the green beans with pasta, and this would have been an A+++.
RISOTTO:
Alex: The risotto itself is like a B+--it was good base. The shiitake bacon I'd give an A. THAT was really good, I'd make mushrooms like that many many times.
JIM: I would give that an A. The shiitake is pretty amazing, and I thought the risotto was good.
Deb: I'd say the risotto itself was a B--I don't like plain risotto--but with the bacon it was an A. It needed much more shiitake bacon.
CAKE
Jim: I'm giving it a B. I think the cake itself could have been a little sweeter and a little punchier. But, of course, if it had been mixed with cream cheese icing the way the recipe called for it may have been enough. The combination of chocolate and pumpkin was good, though.
Alex: I like the texture; it has potential. But, it's not really very good. I'll give it a C+.
Me: An unsweet cake is like decaf coffee or an impoverished Romney...it's a sad flightless bird that makes you feel pity, perplexity and a tiny bit of scorn. B-
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